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hazing Archive

YANKEES RAUNCHY ROOKIE HAZING SHOCKS GOTHAM

The Yankees have done an excellent job of hazing rookies in recently years. Two years ago, Joba Chamberlain, Chien Ming Wang and other rookies dressed like characters from The Wizard of Oz. Last year, the Yankee veterans made Alfredo Aceves and company dress up like the Village People. The Yankees decided to make the logical progression from old school movies and music to old school television.

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Coming into the last game against the Mariners, the Yankee rookies had to dress up like characters from the Batman television series. Mark Melancon was fortunate enough to be Batman and reliever Mike Dunn lucked out as the Riddler. The Yankees also had their operations crew involved with video man Anthony Flynn in a Robin costume, radar gun operator Brett Weber as The Joker, and massage therapist Lou Potter dressed up like the Penguin.

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Skinny Mexican shortstop Ramiro Pena had the unfortunate honor of being Catwoman. Yankee’s captain Derek Jeter commented to the rookie, “You look like Halle Berry, man.” Not quite. The picture of him getting “wanded” by security is amazing. Frankly, Pena’s outfit was extremely frightening. He almost reminds me of Bondage Boy from Craig Ferguson mixed with the gay guy from Real World Cancun. I hope that next year the theme does not include any vinyl bodysuits. Also, what do the Yankee veterans have against the Mexican guys? Last year, Aceves wore arguably the most embarrassing get-up as the “Indian chief” in the Village People.

The shamed rookies were forced to board the chartered plane to Anaheim in the ridiculous outfits. At least CC Sabathia was nice enough to offer to buy them dinner upon landing — as long as they didn’t change clothes. I hope he doesn’t take them to Subway. Considering he dropped thousands on Cavs playoff tickets for teammates in May, I’m guessing he’ll probably treat them to something a bit nicer.

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THE MOST INTERESTING MAN IN THE BRONX

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He loves disco and idolizes Dennis Rodman. He once went fishing — and caught a pelican. His nicknames include “Ace”, “Chelly,” and “Patoncito” (translation: Little Big Foot). He married a woman that could be mistaken for a supermodel. He described dressing as the “Indian” from the Village People as “wonderful”. He once rode a pink bicycle with a wicker basket and blue and gold streamers from the locker room “to get to the field faster”. Alfredo Aceves is The Most Interesting Man In The Bronx.

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RICH MOTHAF*CKA BRIAN ORAKPO GETS HAZED

Brian Orapko transformed into a 260 pound monster while attending the University of Texas. He became a rich man when he was drafted 13th overall by the Redskins in this year’s draft. But when he showed up to camp, he wasn’t the biggest or the richest guy around. Albert Haynesworth holds at least one of those titles and has imposed his will on the Skins rookies along with London Fletcher and Cornelius Griffin. He continued to terrorize the newly professional athletes this week by taping them to the goalpost. O-Sack-Po was the latest victim of Haynesworth when he was tied up with J.D. Skolnitsky.

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Via DC Sports Bog:

I missed the rookie hazing of Kevin Barnes and Robert Henson, who were tied up to the goalposts following Monday evening’s practice. I was sad. But then Brian Orakpo and J.D. Skolnitsky got tied up today, where they received ice water baths, Gatorade showers, and wet towel treatments. That made me happy.

“Albert’s the main culprit,” Orakpo told us. “If you all know Albert, he’s the main culprit. He wants somebody got every day, so don’t be surprised to see this tomorrow.”

Busy schedule. I’d argue for two-a-days, but I’m not in charge. Apparently the DL rookies also have to fetch water for the veterans at meetings and pay fines for all sorts of violations, but this was worse.

“We basically was dying with cold water down our heads, like brain freeze,” Orakpo said. “It felt good for the first five times, then it kept repeating and everybody started coming with different stuff and objects and then it started getting real cold.”

London Fletcher and Cornelius Griffin and Haynesworth were the main instigators, but the defensive backs helped out, with Carlos Rogers devising the Gatorade cans lodged behind the players’ heads. No, he didn’t just accidentally drop the can there.

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